In late spring 2011 I spent three weeks at the Buchinger Klinik in Southern Germany. I went primarily to lose weight and get therapeutic treatments for the herniated disk in my back which my doctors wanted to treat conservatively. It was a little scary going alone when I couldn’t walk very well because of my disc and I was in constant agony.
BUCHINGER DIARIES – DAY ONE
Preparations for a day of fasting day. I woke up this morning with peeing instructions – in a cup and straight to the nurse on my floor. The lovely Helga gave me a present in return – a liquid laxative with the instructions to take it at bedtime (10 pm). I will be cleansed tomorrow several times over – she promised. After which there will be an enema every two days – oooohhhhh can’t wait for that joy!
At 9.15, the lovely, tall and very cute Dr D stuck me with acupuncture needles after which I slept like a baby until lunch time whereupon I wolfed down the fruit plate set in front me and drank some herbal tea.
It is so lovely here and quiet with beautiful views of Lake Constance. I can see Austria, Switzerland and Germany from my room. Everyone is very kind. As far as I can tell Buchinger is full of Arabs – lots of Emiratis, Saudis and Egyptians. They told me the Lebanese were here last month. The owners of Buchinger have invited me to a drinks – fruit juice – cocktail at 5.45…..what to wear…what to wear???
The staff thinks I am thirty three – YEAH! And it is only the first day. I wonder if I will grow older or younger by the time I leave?????
Changing out of six different outfits – don’t know what I was doing by outfit number six which made me look like a refugee from the chorus of Flash Dance – I rushed out of the building only to bump into Mohamed. ‘Mohamed’ I said, ‘how lovely to see you here! How long have you been here? When did you come?’ Now, for those us in the know, Mohamed is a Commissioning Editor of a very famous Qatari news channel. Aha I thought – WORK! Then the man I was gushing over so enthusiastically actually stood still and turned out around. ‘I have been here my whole life’ said Mohamed. Huh??? Embarrassingly, the doppelganger turned out to be Dr Wilhelmi, the owner of Buchinger, who was on his way to the Salon Belgrano to greet us, the newcomers to the Buchinger Family. He is the spitting image of Mohamed I tell you – it was eerie…..I stared….(I put it down to pre-fasting psychosis).
Mr Wilhelmi and Dr Francoise Wilhelmi De Toledo gave a small introductory speech and asked us to introduce ourselves and the reason we came to Buchinger. The highlight of the introductions was an Egyptian man to my left. He told us he had been coming for years, just before the summer holidays to get himself prepared for all the drinking and partying in Cairo (obviously his Cairo and the one on the news are not the same). This year he wants to celebrate his 80th birthday in style he enthused and invited us all for a rocking weekend in Casa Cahira! I was transfixed. Is this what fasting does to you? I want me some of that please. I can certainly see myself as an old rocking, boozer when I am 80. Crazy old coot kept winking at me and here I thought the Flash Dance outfit wasn’t going to work.
OVER & OUT